Shrimp-Like Expat Mistaken for Tempura, Consumed After Collapsing Into Fryer Due to Years of Poor Posture
By KIP DUNGWORTH, STAFF REPORTER
CHIANG MAI, THAILAND — A long-term British expat was accidentally battered, deep-fried, and eaten at a popular izakaya Tuesday night, after collapsing headfirst into an industrial fryer while attempting to retrieve his dropped vape.
The man, 51-year-old Peter Glavin of Swindon, had reportedly lived in Chiang Mai for over a decade, surviving on kombucha, crypto trading, and an Excel-dependent online career, which is understood to have contributed to his unchecked spinal degeneration.
“He curled up just like a prawn,” said sous-chef Natthawat Sirimongkol, who initially mistook the sizzling Farang for a particularly large ebi. “I thought the boss was testing us.”
Witnesses say Glavin’s hunched gait, leathery complexion, and visible dehydration may have contributed to the confusion. By the time the error was recognized, Glavin had been served with dipping sauce to a table of rambunctious Norwegian tourists, who rated the dish “crunchy but underseasoned.”
Emergency responders described the scene as “culinarily confusing, but not even the weirdest thing we’ve seen this week.”
The restaurant, unnamed for legal reasons, has issued an apology to Glavin’s family and is offering lifetime udon to anyone traumatized by the incident.
Officials from the British Embassy said they were “looking into the matter” but noted that posture-related misadventure is not currently covered under consular support.
A police spokesman said that no prosecutions would take place over the matter. “Honestly, it sounds like an honest mistake. And who drops their vape into a deep fat fryer anyways? They’re supposed to be illegal in Thailand,” he said, rolling his eyes.
Glavin’s tempura-battered vape was recovered and will be repatriated with his remains