New Hostel Arrival Asks About King Gizzard Before Learning Anyone’s Name, Nationality, or Boundaries
By TRENT MCGUFFIN, EDITORIAL INTERN
PAI, THAILAND — A recent arrival at a Pai backpacker hostel introduced himself Saturday not with the usual pleasantries, but with an immediate and unprovoked inquiry about fellow guests’ opinions on Australian psych-rock band King Gizzard & the Lizard Wizard.
The man, identified only as “Raf,” 24, from somewhere between Byron Bay and Sydney, reportedly dropped his pack, pulled out a Bluetooth speaker, and launched into a passionate monologue about "microtonal tunings" before anyone asked his name.
Witnesses say the hostel’s common area, previously engaged in a quiet debate about whether to hike or nap, fell into uneasy silence as Raf began referencing deep cuts from obscure albums with the same intensity most reserve for natural disasters or ayahuasca flashbacks.
“I just wanted to know where the showers were,” said Ines, 27, from Belgium, who now knows more about quarter-tone guitar necks than she ever intended. “Instead, I got a five-minute TED Talk on Polygondwanaland.”
Raf, oblivious to the discomfort radiating from the hammocks, pressed on. “You can really feel the fractal time signatures, yeah?” he reportedly asked a confused Dutch couple, who nodded politely and made immediate plans to check out early.
Hostel staff say Raf is far from the first musically evangelical guest, though his refusal to stop looping live bootlegs during breakfast may set a new benchmark in unwanted sonic diplomacy.
“He’s got strong opinions about the band,” said one staff member. “And no apparent opinions about deodorant.”
At press time, Raf was seen cornering a Japanese solo traveler near the water dispenser, gently asking, “But have you really listened to Nonagon Infinity?” The traveler responded by immediately checking out and booking a private hotel room.