Influencer Nominated for Academy Award After Convincing Performance of 7-Eleven Toastie as Fine Dining
By KIP DUNGWORTH, STAFF REPORTER
PHUKET, THAILAND — In what critics are calling “a staggering triumph of imagination over reality,” travel influencer Amélie S., 26, from Lyon, has been unofficially nominated for a “Best Actress in a Leading Delusion” award after describing her late-night ham and cheese toastie from 7-Eleven as “an authentic Thai gastronomic moment.”
The Instagram reel, posted under her handle @AmelieWandersWildly, features slow-motion footage of her peeling apart the half-melted sandwich with reverent precision, set to a swelling orchestral score and accompanied by the caption “Decadent. Divine. Deeply spiritual.”
“It’s not just a snack,” she coos in the voiceover. “It’s a ritual. A journey. A bite of Thailand’s soul.”
Observers, including the 7-Eleven clerk who sold her the toastie, were less impressed. “She asked if it was locally sourced,” he said, lighting a cigarette. “I told her it came from the fridge.”
Fellow travelers at her hostel watched the video with a mix of awe and shame. “She somehow made processed white bread look like foie gras,” said Callum, 31, from Manchester. “Honestly, respect. But also, she’s insane.”
The Academy of Pretension, a loosely organized coalition of travel bloggers, yoga instructors, and freelance copywriters, released a statement praising Amélie’s “courage in elevating beige food to high art.”
Asked for comment, Amélie doubled down. “It’s not just about a toastie,” she said, wearing linen and staring into the middle distance. “It’s about exploring the culinary flavours of the world. And branding.”
At press time, she was reportedly teaming up with a local production company to shoot an instant noodle review with a drone on Karon Beach.