Girthquake: Pattaya Clinic Sued Over Left-Leaning Love Muscle
By TRENT MACGUFFIN, EDITORIAL INTERN
PATTAYA, THAILAND —A British tourist is suing a Pattaya cosmetic clinic after a procedure to enhance his genitals allegedly left him with what he calls a “distinctly leftward lean.”
The man, identified in court documents only as "Simon W.," claims the curve is “unmistakable,” “difficult to explain to romantic partners,” and “not in line with promotional material.”
Simon, a 48-year-old former scaffolder from Woking, said he initially sought the clinic’s services after being handed a flyer by a tuk-tuk driver near Soi 6 promising “premium girthification” and “Swiss-engineered symmetry.”
This reporter attempted to interview Simon outside the provincial court in Pattaya. He declined to comment but did say, “I just want it straight, mate. That’s all I’m asking.”
According to legal filings, the enhancement procedure involved a synthetic dermal filler and was advertised as a “lunchtime treatment” with “no downtime, full uptime.” Simon alleges he experienced pain, swelling, and an “involuntary compass-like curvature” within 48 hours. The clinic has denied wrongdoing.
Dr. Prawit Jansong, the clinic’s lead practitioner, said in a statement that “all procedures are conducted according to Ministry of Public Health guidelines” and that Simon had signed a waiver acknowledging “possible curvature in accordance with individual tissue elasticity.”
This reporter was told by clinic staff that to see the procedure room, he would need to “book a treatment first.” I declined.
The case has attracted the attention of Pattaya’s expat community. Mikey Malone, long-time bar owner and frequent plaintiff in unrelated small claims matters, weighed in: “If you go to a discount clinic behind a go-go bar, you get discount results. I don’t know what else to tell you.”
Medical professionals say post-procedural curvature can happen when dermal fillers migrate or are asymmetrically absorbed. A Bangkok-based urologist, who asked not to be named, confirmed that “the penis is not a load-bearing structure, and precision matters.”
As of press time, Simon is seeking 2.5 million baht in damages and a corrective procedure at a rival clinic in Bangkok.
He also asked the court to compel the Pattaya clinic to “cease all promotional use of the phrase 'The Eiffel Tower of Enhancement.'” However, this appears to be a moot point: as of press time, the clinic’s premises has vacated itshave been vacated.